Unlocking Managerial Excellence: Are You A Toxic Leader?
How do I know if I am the reason for the toxic environment within my team?
“As the Leader of the team, I’ve noticed no one comes to me for help or support. When I ask questions, everyone is afraid to provide their feedback and speak up. Why?
Is it me?”
I'm sure we've all been in a position where, we’re in a team meeting, and we’ve asked a series of questions, waiting for the team to answer. You suddenly feel you’re in a room filled with individuals who just won't respond to you. It’s awkward. You try to prompt the team, you may call on someone, but everyone’s hesitant to respond.
You may start to notice when you go to the lunch room nobody sits with you to have lunch, or when you walk into a room, people quickly disperse or go the other direction.
As a leader that's frustrating . The worst part is, no one is telling you why.
They’re too afraid to tell you.
I'm here to walk you through the importance of self-awareness and understanding whether or not you're the reason for the toxic environment within your team.
Self-awareness is a framework you will need to leverage on a regular basis in your Leadership role.
Self-awareness is about:
knowing your environment;
being aware of your surroundings;
being aware of those around you;
being aware of your actions;
being aware of how you act in public and in front of your team;
being aware of the reaction your team has when they’re around you;
being aware of how you speak to people.
It's hard to know when you’re being a toxic leader because no one else is going to tell you.
Here are some questions to ask yourself:
How do I speak to my team?
How do I react to their feedback?
How do I respond when they ask me questions?
Am I taking the time to listen to their concerns?
Do I actively listen to what they are telling me?
Am I just listening to respond?
Am I treating my team with respect?
Do I inspire and motivate my team, or am I condescending and rude?
When my team makes a mistake, do I pass the blame on them, or do I seek to understand?
Am I open with my communication, or do I keep everything to myself?
In Leadership, we want to be authentic, but there’s a fine line when it comes to being true to who you are and being disrespectful to your team. If you’re naturally inclined to be rude to others, harsh when speaking to people, or tend to want to be left alone, this behavior will not build relationships with your team, or anyone at work. Your title as a Leader/Manager does not give you the right to treat people poorly. Leadership is a privilege. As a Leader, we all work on the same team, we simply have different roles. Therefore respect is mutual and goes both ways. If you find it difficult to be genuinely nice to others, or have a hard time providing support to your team, you should reconsider whether management and leadership is a suitable career for you.
To practice self-awareness: take pauses throughout your day to question your last interaction with a team member. Replay the interaction in your mind and ask yourself to describe your behavior. Think about the delivery of your messaging, what words did you use to describe your feedback? What was your body language signaling throughout the discussion? Lastly, think of the reaction from your team member. Did they seem responsive or did they appear to be nervous? Did you cut them off when they spoke, or did you give them a chance to share their thoughts?
Taking time to reflect on your actions will provide you with a better understanding of how you treat your team members. By doing this frequently, you will be able to tap into self-awareness more frequently during the live discussions. If you happen to notice your tone is harsh, you can simply take a moment to pause and readjust. You can also acknowledge this with your team member by simply saying, ‘pardon my last comment, let me take a moment to start over, as I realize now, how that may have sounded and that’s not my intention…’
Self-awareness takes time, be patient with yourself.
To evaluate whether you’re making improvements, find yourself a sponsor or mentor who you can connect with and share your experience with, and see if you’re on the right track.
